Monthly Archives: January 2016



I’m starting to take cold showers again. I wonder how long I’ll last.

There’s something about that initial wave when the frigid water chillingly pierces every part of your body. It makes you recoil and examine how vulnerable you feel. From head to toe your body wants to shiver and flail about. Your skin flinches and sends flurried messages to the brain, “Either block this gnawing ice or run away from its freezing grasp!”.

Focus. Deep breaths. Slow breaths. Deep breaths. Slow breaths.

“They cannot fight the cold.”

One wrong step and you fall.



“I am your enemy, the first one you’ve ever had who was smarter than you. There is no teacher but the enemy. No one but the enemy will tell you what the enemy is going to do. No one but the enemy will ever teach you how to destroy and conquer. Only the enemy shows you where you are weak. Only the enemy tells you where he is strong. And the rules of the game are what you can do to him and what you can stop him from doing to you. I am your enemy from now on. From now on I am your teacher.”

Winning this war is important to me. I’ll do what it takes. Do your best to do your worst. Subject me to every test imaginable.



A smile is like one of the strongest faces one will ever force. No, wait, a smile is like one of the strongest forces one will ever face. Who can ever stop you from smiling?

“I like a man who grins when he fights.”

Imagine this simulation. And close your eyes during the picture. Focus on all your senses and feelings.

You just lost a fight. A man holds you at gunpoint and slowly demands you for your last words. Your mind, searching for the answer, races through all the events that led up to this point. Feelings of terror, shock, confusion, and anger all bombard you and they threaten to tear you apart. You exhaust every possibility until you can’t imagine anymore. You’re broken. There is no answer to the question. But that’s the important part. Once you realize this, you grin at him and slowly open your eyes.

“Do you have anything to say?”

“I’m like a..”

“Let’s go, let’s go!”



“Keep it simple, stupid.”

Trust your passion and instincts.



I dream of eras past.

“Isn’t it a little late?”

I shall endure.

“Shouldn’t you fly away?”

On my wings. I bring the storm.

Something ancient stirs…



“Man’s reach exceeds his imagination!”

“I’m going there to end this war.”

A means to an end.

“You have controlled your fear. Now, release your anger. Only your hatred can destroy me.”

“Take a minute to consider your achievement. I once told you about a sailor who drowned.”

Yes, he said it was like going home.

“I lied. He said it was agony.”

“When I left you, I was but the learner; now I am the master.”

“That name no longer has any meaning for me!”

People change. Flip it and call. Heads or tails? It doesn’t even matter.



“I killed them. I killed them all. They’re dead, every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women and the children, too. They’re like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals. I hate them!”

“That was brave, boy, but foolish. I would have thought you’d have learned your lesson.”

I’m a slow learner.

“Are you going to kill me?”

I would certainly like to!

“I know you would. I can feel your anger. It gives you focus… makes you stronger.”

“You’re not all-powerful”

Well, I should be.

“You don’t need guidance, Anakin. In time, you will learn to trust your feelings. Then, you will be invincible. I have said it many times, you are the most gifted Jedi I have ever met.”

“Do you have anything to say?”




“How feel you?”

Cold, sir.

“Afraid are you?”

No, sir.

“See through you we can.”

“Be mindful of your feelings.”



“Obsession is a young man’s game.”

Is it time to play with attractive forces?

“The secret impresses no one. The trick you use it for is everything.”

Remove the safety “net”. Magic.

“Are you watching closely?”

There are two sides to a coin. Head and tails. There are two poles on a magnet. North and south. There are two types of people.

“We both had half of a full life, which was somehow enough for us. But not for them.”

There is a heavy price to pay to keep the secret.

“See, sacrifice, Robert. That’s the price of a good trick. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?”

I’d like to fall for a good trick.

“Now you’re looking for the secret. But you won’t find it because of course, you’re not really looking. You don’t really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.”

Do I want to know the real “you”?



“Aren’t you cold?”

No. I’m not cold.

“Are you cold?”

I used to always tell people, “No. I’m not cold.” I’m not sure why.

    Is it because it’s more convenient to have a default answer?
    Is it because the answer doesn’t really matter?

“But you’re not shivering.”

I am cold. I don’t necessarily need to shiver.

“Aren’t you ___?”

No. I’m not.

“Are you ___?”